Kosher rules on dating men

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Ellen Fein and Sherrie Schneider's 1996 book created a media stir, with such dating commandments as: Wear lipstick when you go jogging; get a nose job if you need it; never accept a date for the weekend later than the preceding Wednesday; never, ever call a guy before he calls you.

Boteach, a short, bearded man with the self-effacing style of a Jewish stand-up comedian, was clearly there to plug – a Jewish singles Web site that gave him the title “matchmaker in chief” – and to promote his books.

“He had very positive messages: focus on virtues, not manipulating men.” “I thought he would be more wild and left-wing, but actually he had very positive things to say,” said kippah-wear-ing Chaim Davis, a single 37-year-old.

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During a recent New York “debate” between “Kosher Sex” Rabbi Shmuley Boteach and the authors of the dating guide “The Rules,” the largely Jewish audience was as raucous as that for any daytime talk show.

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But the Rules Girls, as they refer to themselves, are also savvy media handlers, and, as the two-hour event moderated by talk show host Judith Regan progressed, they grew increasingly aggressive – some might say shrill – in challenging Boteach and the audience.Although you can filter for only Jewish options on many dating sites, and even denominations of Judaism on others, JSwipe's layout somehow made it all easier.You could check off Orthodox, Conservative, Reform, or the vague but sufficient “Just Jewish,” which I assumed meant “I need someone with a circumcised penis who read at least one line of Hebrew around his 13th birthday.”There is also “other” and “willing to convert” (more on those categories later).“Do not become corrupted by agenda-driven men and don't lose your femininity.” Schneider, who broke into giggles frequently during the debate, ended with, “I think the rabbi's very nice, but if I were single I'd call [us] for advice.We get you from date one to two to three and married.” Slowly exiting the synagogue, one woman was overheard observing that the event illustrated the “eternal conflict” between men and women, but her male companion said, “I thought they all came off as superficial.” Outside, 36-year-old Wayne Borges, who is single, said he liked Boteach's philosophy.

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