Dating military guy who disappears
‘We’d planned to have children, but always seemed to be waiting for the “right time”. I was beside myself and he shouted, “Don’t you understand? ”’ They are now going through a divorce, but Dan has shown no regret or humility.
I felt as though time was running out.’ Dan clearly had other priorities – Sophie’s disappearing income. ‘He’s determined to get what he says is an “equal share” of the assets,’ says Sophie.
‘Dan was incredibly charming, gregarious, popular, principled,’ she says. I’d have described him as family oriented.’ The two met in 1998 while working for the same company, and married in 2006. He pursued certain interests – running was one – to the point of obsession (the typical psychopath exhibits intense enthusiasm for hobbies, people, projects, which begin and end abruptly).
Though Sophie didn’t know it at the time, some of Dan’s behaviour was typical of a psychopath. Sophie – who very soon became the higher earner – would think nothing of taking him to Selfridges to spend hundreds on designer clothes for him. He also used Sophie to pursue his goal – and that goal was sex.‘Dan never had any money, but always had a good excuse,’ says Sophie. ” One day, I saw on a statement that he’d taken cash out on a credit card.
They are husbands and ex-husbands, colleagues and CEOs, men who can charm, manipulate and run circles around the rest of us simply because they act with no emotional attachment, compassion or deep connection to rein them in. Most psychopaths are not murderers, nor even criminals.
They are husbands and ex-husbands, colleagues and CEOs, men who can charm and manipulate because they act with no emotional attachment or compassion to rein them in.
There’s no reason to do that, and for once, none of his explanations was plausible.’ After two days of questioning, Dan admitted that he had spent the money on prostitutes.
It turned out that he’d been visiting them throughout their marriage.
However, despite a recent spate of cases involving charming and manipulative husbands like Webster who have killed their partners (see overleaf), most psychopaths are not murderers or even criminals.
One study found a larger proportion of psychopaths (four or five times greater) among CEOs, directors and supervisors than among the general population. ‘He’s the lion and you’re the impala running innocently through the field.’ A psychopath will use a partner to gratify his needs.
(Recklessness, ruthlessness, persuasion and charisma go down well in business.) And even if they aren’t doing well, they’ll talk a good game. He could be marrying for the short-term, whirlwind thrill of it, or to acquire social respectability; he may be in search of a trophy wife, or marrying for money.
Eight months into their marriage, a man sedates his wife, places her comatose body in the passenger seat of a car, drives to a remote Aberdeenshire road, sets fire to the car causing her death, and claims it was a tragic accident.
He walks away with a £200,000 life insurance payout, then meets and marries victim number two.